Julie is having a very good year

Julie Drake: I have had a very good year, lots of exciting things. I had a baby and as of August the fifth, I finally got down to my pre-pregnancy weight. So thank you. Thank you. My daughter is 23.

Andrea Marie: We are Moms Unhinged, a nationally touring standup comedy show. Join us in our podcast as we explore everything from motherhood, midlife, crisis, marriage, divorce, online dating, menopause, and other things that irritate us.

Hello everyone and welcome to Mom’s Unhinged, the podcast. I’m your host Andrea, and I am here with the wonderful, the fabulous Julie Drake calling in from Oklahoma.

Julie Drake: Hello.

Andrea Marie: And Julie’s been amazing. She’s been on tons of Moms Unhinged shows. She performs all over the country, does a lot in Tulsa and Oklahoma City, and just is a just wonderful person, I’m just gonna say that.

Julie Drake: We thank you and I’m happy to be part of Moms Unhinged.

And be able to connect with, you know, so many female comics and of course, you know, the audiences which are predominantly female. Of course. It’s just nice to be able to connect with so many women at one time when we do those shows.

Andrea Marie: I know, I know. It’s so fun. It’s so fun. The shows are just fabulous.

Discovering stand-up comedy as a kid

Andrea Marie: So Julie, why don’t you tell us a little bit about your comedy journey? How did you get into comedy? I always just love to find out some people’s stories here.

Julie Drake: I’ll tell you how I found what standup comedy was, and this is really gonna age me. I couldn’t find any. No, it is, it is. I couldn’t find anything to watch when I was probably 11 ish or 12 too young. But anyways, so we had those things like the cable box where you could zip the dial along, you know what I mean?

Did you have a cable box?

Andrea Marie: Yeah. I don’t think we, we weren’t rich enough for cable, but yeah, Okay. friends had them.

Julie Drake: So we had the cable box and I couldn’t find anything and I got so mad and I took the dial and I went and zipped like that and it landed on channel two, which was HBO. And I heard this guy screaming and I’m like, what is he screaming at? And it was Sam Kinison doing his oh oh. And I’m like, what is he doing?

I’d never even heard of standup. I didn’t know. And I watched it and I was like, I don’t understand what he’s doing. I can still remember going. He’s just talking to people. Like, what? And then after it sunk in, I was like, let me watch that again. Even though I shouldn’t have been watching Sam Kinison at 11 or 12.

Oh my gosh. But I was completely unsupervised as a child, so I watched it again and it sunk again because I was so young. And then after a couple days I was like. Oh, he’s talking about things that would normally be taboo or, bad things that happen and making them funny. And I’m like, that’s amazing.

The female comics who influenced Julie

Julie Drake: And then I just started watching all the standup and I grew up watching, like, they had Ladies of the Night, which was like, Rita Rudner, Ellen DeGeneres, Judy Tenuta, I said that wrong. And Paula Poundstone.

Those four were like my idols growing up. I loved all four of ’em, especially like Paula and Rita.

I just started like watching standup, like nonstop. Like it was like an, and it wasn’t available then like it is now. Like you could turn on and watch a million comics. So when you were watching it, you knew it was gonna be like real special and, I just really absorbed it and I loved it and I was like, I have to do that.

But it didn’t happen for me when I was young and I can remember, I actually, I headlined a show last August and a lot of my high school friends were there and they said that it was amazing because they were like, do you remember when you were in school and you would do full standup routines of people you’d watch on HBO?

And I was like, not really, but I believe it. And they’re like, yeah, you used to do the entire, like you’d watch so many times you could do the entire set and do standup for us. So they were like, yeah, they were like, it’s really amazing to see. You as a child, you know, younger and then you’re an adult now and you’re actually doing it.

They were like, it’s really awesome. And so it meant a lot that they were there to support me and that they had remembered that. So it was pretty cool. Full circle moment.

Andrea Marie: Yeah, yeah. That’s so cool. I love that so much. So you watched all that. You absorbed it all, and then you didn’t actually start doing standup till later.

Why comedy felt like the last dream left

Julie Drake: Right. I was, it was a week before my, two weeks before my 39th birthday.

Andrea Marie: Uh huh.

Julie Drake: I’d always wanted, like I had tried to do standup, it was probably 2008 or nine. I had a set written down. And then the night I was gonna go, something happened and I couldn’t make it. So I was like, forget it. It’s probably stupid anyways.

I had, she’s gonna kill me, but, I had on my computer, they were doing a Nickelodeon’s Funniest Mom in America contest. And I’d never done standup, but I had it up. And my daughter, she was young, she was probably, I don’t know, seven, eight. She goes, were you gonna do this? And I go, yeah.

And she goes, well, you’re just gonna embarrass yourself.

Andrea Marie: Oh girls.

Julie Drake: I know. So I was like, this is stupid. You know, I was kinda like, this is stupid. So yeah, and it, my kids were young, my kids were too young for me to dedicate time to it. I had a lot of things going on anyway, so I was like, it’s just, I could feel it. I was like, I wanted to do it, but I could just feel it wasn’t the right time.

And then you know, I was kind of like, yeah, that probably is stupid. You know, like I’m a mom, like time has passed, you know, what am I doing? So, but I started two weeks before my 39th birthday because I was, it actually came from like the worst, like I was the most unhappy I’d ever been in my life through a number of things.

And I remember going, while my life is a complete pile of whatever. Let me just go at, this is what I said. I said I’m gonna do standup. I’m gonna go to an open mic night. I’m gonna do horrible. And I can forget that dream too, and I can just start from ground zero.

Andrea Marie: I can forget that dream too.

Julie Drake: I know, that’s what I said.

Real positive beginnings. Oh my God.

Andrea Marie: Let’s just stomp on all of my dreams at once.

Julie Drake: That’s what I said, that’s standup was like the last dream on the shelf that I had. And I was like, let me just take it off the shelf and just put it into the fire so we could just get rid of everything at once.

Andrea Marie: Burn it to the ground.

Julie Drake: We’ll just burn it all to the ground. And it ended up working out, which was really funny.

I’m like, everyone thinks it’s gonna be like this positive story. And I was like, no. I was literally at the lowest point in my life and decided to just go for broke and just say, forget it.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

Julie Drake: And I think it worked because I really didn’t care and I felt like I had nothing left to lose. And so I think the way that I went up on stage, I can’t remember it ’cause my adrenaline was so high, but I think the way that I went up on stage was just so I don’t care. And so I don’t, you know, hatever.

Andrea Marie: I’m not invested. If you laugh, I don’t. Yeah.

Julie Drake: Yeah. And I think that it just worked to my advantage and it ended up going really well for a first timer and then.

You know, seeing like that I actually did it and it, everyone responded well. I was like, and I haven’t stopped since then. That was over 10 years ago.

Andrea Marie: What was it like after getting off stage? You were going in thinking, Ugh, this is gonna suck. How did it feel coming off that stage?

Julie Drake: I’ve never done drugs, but I have to imagine that’s what drugs feels like. I’m serious. My feet didn’t touch the ground for weeks. I was so happy. I was so excited. I was like, I really did it and it worked and I feel great and it literally like, sort of brought me back to life because for so long I was just in, I was just in survival mode.

I was going to work, I had two jobs. I was going to both jobs, coming home, cleaning, doing everything just to stay alive. I wasn’t doing anything fun. I wasn’t doing anything for myself. You know, I just ended another bad relationship. So I was just kind of just dead inside. And that’s kind of why I did it.

I was like, let’s just, and it was the first time in a long, long time that I felt that much genuine happiness. Literally, for weeks, I was just on cloud nine. I mean, nothing could ever, besides like, things with your children, but I’m saying outside of your children.

It was the best feeling I’d ever had, and it was all me. Like, no one was up there with me.

Andrea Marie: Mm-hmm.

Julie Drake: And it just felt amazing. So you’re constantly trying to recapture that feeling from to week to week.

Andrea Marie: I know some weeks.

Julie Drake: Moms Unhinged is like, the feeling from those shows is so good and you’re so high and you’re like, okay, I need another one.

I need another hit. I need another, you know what I mean?

Andrea Marie: Yeah, yeah. So now how old, so this is right before your third nine. How old were your kids at this point?

Julie Drake: My son was like 19. ‘Cause I was a young mom and so my daughter she was almost 14. She would’ve been 14 that November. So she was kind of at the point where she was hanging out with her friends anyways.

Andrea Marie: Yeah. You had a little more freedom. Yeah.

Julie Drake: Yeah, I definitely, of course my son’s, you know, he’s not hanging out with mom.

She’s starting to not hang out with mom, and so it just happened all at the, it all like happened at the right time.

Andrea Marie: Yeah. Now we were talking just briefly, before we hopped on about you doing things in reverse and that kind of fits in with this. So most, like a lot of people start standup when they’re young. You started older. What else have you done in reverse?

Being the “old” student in college

Julie Drake: I went to college in my, I started college in my mid to late twenties. I was always the oldest one in all my classes, which is so funny ’cause I was like, and I can remember, one of my professors, he goes, where are you gonna come back next semester? And I was like. No, I think I’m gonna quit. And he is like, why?

You’re a great student. And I said, well, you know, they’re all giving me crap about being old. Mind you, I was like 28 years old, which is not old.

Andrea Marie: 28. 28 years. So you’re ancient.

Julie Drake: I know. So old. But lot of these were kids that were like 18, 19. They were so, you know, they saw me as old ’cause I was always the oldest one in the class.

And he goes, you know, he called me Ms. Drake. He’s like, you know, Ms. Drake, the time is gonna pass by anyways. He goes, whether you don’t go to college or whether you sit at home, he goes, the time is gonna pass. He goes, why don’t you make it count? He goes, ’cause I can tell you this. You don’t wanna get to the end of your life and ruminate and like, go, I wish I’d done all these things.

He goes, so why not pass the time with the things you wanna do? He goes, who cares what these people say? He’s like, they’re losers. That’s what he told me.

Andrea Marie: And they’re losers.

Julie Drake: That’s what he said.

And he’s like the teacher said that, and he’s like, what do you care? He is like, how did these people have so much control over your life? You know?

He’s like, you know, you’re a single mom. You work, you have two kids, you’re an A student. And he goes, what do you care about? Some kid that still lives in his mom’s basement that is barely passing? And he’s like, forget it, you know? He goes, just make the time count.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

Becoming pregnant at 17

Julie Drake: That was definitely, and then of course, the most in reverse.

I got pregnant at 17, so yeah. You know, started off with the family first and then, you know, should have been college, then maybe stand up and then the child. But it all since lived life in reverse.

Andrea Marie: So you have, that is just so interesting because you have young children and then you decide to dive into, were you working also? And then you decide to dive into college too. How did you juggle all of that?

Julie Drake: I don’t know. My daughter was saying that, and I’m sure you know you as a mom that they’re sort of hard on you when you’re raising them. And then she said to me probably a few months ago, I don’t know how you did it, this is really hard. ’cause became a mom.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

Raising kids as a single mom

Julie Drake: There was one point I was working a full-time job going to college, taking care of my kids.

And at one point I was working two or three jobs and doing all of that. So I, the guess the answer is I didn’t sleep. I don’t know.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

Julie Drake: I didn’t sleep. There was not, I mean, it was bad. It was really bad.

Andrea Marie: Homework and all of that. I can’t both homework for you and the kids, you know, and that’s crazy.

Julie Drake: It was crazy.

Andrea Marie: So what was the decision to go back into school? Just ’cause you want, you didn’t get a chance to, and you wanted to, you know, get that, what was that? Like just deciding with all that going on.

Julie Drake: I can tell you exactly what happened is I wanted to move to Dallas and I applied at the Volvo call center, which would just be customer service. It was like 12 bucks an hour. And this was before I had my daughter, and, they turned me down because I didn’t have a college degree. Now, mind you, I’m serious now, mind you, I’d already worked in a call center, you know.

From the time I left home till that point in time, I’d worked in a call center. So I had the experience. I helped run a call center, and so I was like, if I ever wanna get out of Oklahoma or really do well, I’m gonna have to get a degree. Like it was a reality check.

And there was a lot of other jobs that I didn’t even apply to that said you have to have a college degree.

And so, and then I had my daughter. So I was like, college is gonna have to wait. And then I waited a few years and went back, just part-time, just a few classes here and there,

Andrea Marie: Mm-hmm.

Julie Drake: just to get started. Just ’cause I was like, if anything happens and I don’t have a degree, you know. I mean, if I need a degree to go make 12 bucks an hour, what’s?

You know what I mean? Like, I have to like ensure myself that I’m gonna be fit for the workforce if anything happens. So that’s what pushed me to go back and get my degree, which to this day I’ve still never used. And I joke about that on stage. But it’s a great accomplishment to look at it.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

Julie Drake: And go, I did this and I did this with a lot of bad circumstances, and I’m still proud of myself for getting it, and I’ll still have it and no one can take it away. It actually made me a better, I don’t know, employee. It made me, it just made me a better person in a lot of ways, and I am proud of it, but I never used it.

Andrea Marie: Darn it. Well, that is, that is quite common actually. But I mean, you know, people go and they end up doing something totally different now. I mean, but I think it also helps with, just like you, you know, your esteem as a person and just knowing like, hey, it builds resilience. It builds like just organizational skills, all of that. That come into play too. And I think that’s why, you know, some people require it, even if you’ve been doing it silly that you would’ve been doing that job and they wouldn’t even, you know, just a piece of paper. But at the same time, it’s, yeah.

Julie Drake: Yeah. But yeah, it is good to have and it did teach me, it taught me discipline is what it taught me.

Andrea Marie: Yeah, yeah.

Julie Drake: A lot of discipline.

Refusing to take “no” as an answer

Andrea Marie: Yeah, right. So you do the comedy set that like kinda gets you on the right trajectory. What was next after that? Like what was the, did you start? Just like you said, you’ve never quit, but like, did you just start going to as many things as you could go to when did, because now you’re doing this full time, right?

Julie Drake: Mm-hmm.

Andrea Marie: Yeah, yeah. So that’s a 10 year that’s pretty quick to go from very first set ever to full-time comedian in 10 years. That’s pretty amazing.

Julie Drake: Yeah, I’ll tell you what happened in, Oklahoma City, smaller market for comedy. It’s bigger now. It was different 10 years ago, which is crazy ’cause 10 years ago isn’t that long. T here was only two, really two places you could get booked at. One was a comedy club, which is no longer operating.

The owner’s retired and she had a really good, I can’t think of what the word is. I guess policy that she wasn’t gonna watch you once or twice and just put you on stage. She had to watch you continually over a period of time to make sure that you would do different material, that you could work different crowds, et cetera.

So I knew it was gonna be like a year or more before she’d give me a chance. The other booking company, he, you know, preferred to book his friends, which was fine. You know, that’s a whole lot of comedy works. What I did was I was like, well I gotta do something because what’s here in Oklahoma City isn’t gonna work out for me right now.

So I reached out to this booker, I’d seen his name on all of these flyers in Tulsa, which is about an hour and a half north of OKC. And I reached out to him, I said, Hey, I’ve been doing comedy a couple months, been doing all the mics. I can’t get on any shows here. Will you put me on something? And he goes, sure, but it’s not gonna pay.

And I said, I don’t care. I just need to get experience. And so I just started. That’s how like, that’s really like how I got started is I did his show and then I did well and then someone was there and invited me. He did like a New Faces Showcase and they had bookers there and I did the New Faces Showcase and then I got booked from probably five or six different people there.

And then it just grew from there. But it was because, you know, like I had, where I was like, well, you know, I’m gonna have to do something like if I wanna get booked, I’m not gonna sit here and cry about it. I’m gonna like, I’m gonna find a way.

Andrea Marie: Yeah yeah.

Julie Drake: I had to drive an hour and a half, you know, one way, you know, there’s tolls. It was expensive.

Andrea Marie: Mm-hmm.

Julie Drake: But I was like, this is the only way I’m gonna be able to break in, in any way. And I was you know, five, six months in, I was doing a show at the club in Tulsa and I was doing outta state gigs and all that stuff, just from going, well, I’m gonna figure it out on my own then, because I’m just not gonna sit here and just accept it.

And that’s really how I got started. And met a lot of great people. People I’m still friends with today. That’s just how it is.

Andrea Marie: We’re doing it.

Julie Drake: You know?

Andrea Marie: With or without you guys.

Julie Drake: I mean, that’s like Moms Unhinged.

Andrea Marie: I know, I know. Exactly. It sort of is the same idea is that, you know, we just are like, you know what you’re, we’re just gonna make our own show. That’s it is we’re going to, you know, we’re not gonna wait around to invited, we’re just gonna make our own show.

So, yeah. And I think that great things can be born outta that, obviously, because you’ve just got, you know, it’s this drive to make it work and then it works. So don’t take no for an answer. So that’s it.

Julie Drake: I was like, well, there’s more than one way to do this, and it isn’t gonna work here. I’ll figure out the, it’s being a single mom or being a mom, there were so many times where I was like, well, it isn’t gonna work this way, but I have to make it work. So I would find another way. So just my resilience is being a single mom.

Like I will find a way to make it work like that’s going to happen.

The vacuum story that horrified her kids

Andrea Marie: That is awesome. I love that. One of the things I love to ask, so speaking of motherhood, one of the things I love to ask everyone who comes on the show is for an unhinged moment, either as a parent or with your parents, just so we can all feel. A little less alone in this. We’ve all had our unhinged moments, so what’s something that has not gone quite right?

Julie Drake: I don’t know if this qualifies, but this is the first one that popped in my brain and when everyone hears it, they’re like, what is wrong with you?

Obviously, you know, raising my kids of my own, I had a lot of financial difficulties and sometimes I would have to figure things out. ’cause I’m like, we can’t go without. And I remember how horrified my children were because this is so embarrassing. Our vacuum broke. You know, I was like, I don’t have enough money for a new vacuum.

Like, what am I gonna do?

And my neighbor who I could have borrowed it from, she wasn’t home. I don’t know where she was. And I was like, well, I have to vacuum like it’s gross. So I came up with the great idea. I went to Walmart and I wrote a check for a vacuum and I went home and I vacuumed. And then I took, and I took the vacuum back the same I lied and said it didn’t work.

Andrea Marie: Oh my god. You know? I’m sure you’re not the only one who’s done something like this. I used to have a friend who would wear dresses with, and she would never cut the tags off, and I then she’d return ’em. I’m like, oh my goodness.

Julie Drake: I done that. I done that. I tell you, have done that many times where I’m like, okay, I need a nice dress. I’m not gonna wear it once. So I would just, I would do that too. But my kids were like, you’re really gonna, you really bought a vacuum to return it? And I’m like, well, how else was I gonna get the the fuller clean?

And they were there’s something wrong with you. Like truly.

Andrea Marie: Well, it’s gotta be hard, you know? I mean, yeah, as a single mother, young, you know, that’s the other thing. When you’re young, you’re just not making a lot of money and to, you know, kids are so expensive. I mean, they really are. And of course you’re probably prioritizing anything that they need, you know, vacuums.

Julie Drake: Of course.

Andrea Marie: Way down on the bottom of the list.

Julie Drake: Yeah, it would always go bills, food, and then whatever the kids needed. Yeah. And then whatever’s left is whatever’s left, which would not ever be a lot. Yeah, you know.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

So you were working in a call center and then like, so what were you doing when your kids were young? Like what were some of the things you were doing? Because I mean, single moms too, that’s another hard thing is that it’s you’ve gotta work at a job that pays enough to pay for whatever daycare you might need, you know?

Julie Drake: As far as daycare, I did get assistance with that, thankfully. Otherwise, I don’t know what I would’ve done. I mean, I was lucky enough that I had a job where I got off at four o’clock.

So made the mornings rough, but like when my son would come home from school, you know, I would be there.

So he wouldn’t have to be in school all day, then with a sitter all night, which I wouldn’t have liked.

Even though it didn’t pay a lot of money, I mean. Paid the bills. We never starved, it just made it rough. But I was also there at night, which I felt like was the most important thing.

Andrea Marie: So important.

Julie Drake: Yeah, which is also why I started comedy later ’cause I was like, everyone’s situation’s different.

I’m not judging, but I didn’t have any family or anyone to help me. So I was like, there’s no way I can leave him in school all day and then leave him with a sitter at night. Every night I’m out at bars trying to figure out, you know, a joke.

Andrea Marie: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I started comedy later too, and it is more like, I was like, I just wanna be there. You know?

Julie Drake: Mm-hmm.

Andrea Marie: The time is so precious and you can’t, yeah. I mean, sometimes people’s, everyone’s situation is different, but I’m sure that was just such a blessing to be able to be there with your kids for that time, and, you know really have that quality time with them. Until then, you know, then they’re teenagers and they don’t wanna see you. So, you know, it’s a perfect time to start comedy.

You’ll never regret time spent with your kids

Julie Drake: Well, I had a comedian friend he was struggling with being a dad and, comedy, and I said, look, I’m not gonna tell you what to do. I’m just gonna tell you my opinion as someone who’s lived that? And I said, kids are only kids one time.

I said, they’re only gonna be eight months, nine months, 10 months. And you can never replicate those experiences. And I said, comedy will always be there. It’s always gonna be there. And I said, and the further you go in life, the more you have to talk about. And I said, you’ll never regret being there for your kids. You are gonna regret missing things with your children, especially if you, he only has one.

And I said, my advice to you. As a parent knowing that I never missed out on a single thing with my kids and I don’t regret it. Pick your kid. You know, you can come back. i swear comedy will be there. It’s not going anywhere. It’s never gonna go away.

But you’re really gonna regret you’re gonna, your kid’s gonna be a teenager shortly and she’s not gonna want anything to do with you.

And then you’re gonna be like, wait a minute. You know, I didn’t get to see her for the past five or six years, and probably gonna feel guilty about it.

Andrea Marie: Yeah.

Julie Drake: And I joked with ’em, I said, I know I’m not gonna tell you what to do, but I just told you what to do. But I said, you’ll never regret being there for your children.

I don’t regret waiting. I don’t regret because I didn’t miss a single thing with my kids. I could tell you everything that they did. I was there for every play, every single thing. And I’m glad I was, I mean. they knew that if there was a play or something that I was gonna be there. It wasn’t even a question.

Andrea Marie: Mm-hmm.

Julie Drake: And I think that that does a lot for your kids’ self-esteem and value and, I think that it just does a lot for ’em in those formative years.

Andrea Marie: Yeah, for sure. For sure. And you know, people used to always tell me like, oh, it goes so fast. And it’s really hard to believe that when you’re exhausted and it’s like, are you sure it goes fast? ‘Cause this feels real slow, you know?

Julie Drake: I know.

Andrea Marie: But looking back, it really is. It’s so true. It feels like a blink of an eye at this point, you know, now that they’re in their twenties and I’m like, wow, man. But yeah, it is. That’s great advice that you gave him. And hopefully he takes it to heart and does spends time and I think I’m glad that dads are stepping in a little bit more to that role.

I think it’s been traditionally, you know. That they’re out and about more.

So it’s good. Yeah.

Well, this has been just so much fun. Why don’t you let people know where they can find you online, follow you and all that stuff? And if you have anything special to mention, feel free.

Julie Drake: Oh, I’m on Instagram. It’s @juliecomedy and TikTok is @juliecomedy1, and then the number one. And then just Facebook is just Julie Drake.

Andrea Marie: Awesome. We’ll put those links in the show notes so people can, follow you, connect with you, all that stuff. And we’re so excited to, keep touring with Moms Unhinged and see you again sometime.

Julie Drake: Yes. And thank you for the brainchild of Moms Unhinged. It’s amazing. If you haven’t seen a show, you have to see a show because it’s always a phenomenal night and I look forward to them a lot. So thank you. Thank you for that brainchild and including me in it.

Andrea Marie: Yeah. Thanks, Julie.

Julie Drake: All right, thank you. Bye.

Andrea Marie: Thanks for listening and make sure you subscribe, share, and follow us on the socials to get more comedy clips.